This is my definition of domestic discipline.
Now I'll break it down. Since most DD relationships, including mine, are male-led, I'm writing from that point of view.
Domestic discipline is a relationship built on love, trust and respect in which the head of household has the right and responsibility to set and enforce guidelines for the good of the relationship, the family and the home with the full consent of his partner.
A relationship built on love, trust and respect
These three things are necessary for any relationship, not just a DD relationship. Whether you're in the head of household or submissive role, there needs to be love for your partner.
It takes a huge amount of trust on both sides. The head of household has to trust that his partner isn't going to run screaming to the police the first time he spanks her. Or take advantage of the dynamic to satisfy a kink. The submissive partner has to trust that her HoH isn't going to take advantage of his role. That he'll set rules for the benefit of them, not himself. That he will be strict, yet fair with his punishments.
Respect is also huge. The woman must respect her husband's right to lead, to set the rules necessary for their happiness and safety, to enforce those rules when needed. The man must respect that his wife has given him a very valuable, very fragile gift in her submission and that her submission does not in any way means she's less than him..
The right and responsibility to set and enforce guidelines
I think some get caught up in the rights of a HoH, but forget it's also an awesome responsibility. Just like a ship with no captain will roll in the waves, a DD relationship will flounder if the HoH doesn't take responsibility for setting the rules needed and for enforcing those rules when necessary.
For the good of the relationship, the family and the home
It's easy to get caught up in being in a position of authority. There are some that even abuse this authority by setting guidelines to benefit themselves. A true head of household avoids selfishness and sets rules that benefit their partner, their relationship and their family.
With the full consent of his partner
Domestic discipline requires equal effort from both sides. Both partners need to be on board. Without consent, it's abuse.