Saturday, January 19, 2013

Reasonable

We were laying in bed talking. And by talking, I mean Steve was talking and I was listening. Well he called it talking. I called it lecturing. Between hormones and stressing about a financial situation, I was a bit off this week and it was showing in a number of ways so he felt like it was time to nip things in the bud.

Everything he was saying made perfect sense. Even I had to agree with him. But I didn't want to because that meant I was agreeing that I deserved the spanking I was going to get. It didn't matter that he was right and I did deserve it. I just didn't want to admit it.


That's when I turned to him and said it.

"I hate it when you're all reasonable. I can't argue with it."

He just laughed and said it was good because I shouldn't be arguing with him anyway.

When we first started out, Steve was a bit hesitant about laying down the law and standing his ground. The lecture was an area of particular weakness for him. He'd tell me what I was in trouble for and I'd immediately start debating about it. I would use my full arsenal of excuses, loopholes and the occasional offer of exotic sexual favors, anything to get out of being spanked. Even though I had asked for all this, I was having a hard time truly letting go of control. As a result, he ended up backing down a lot more than he probably should have.

But he's had a lot of growth these past few months. One area of that growth has been the lecture. Now instead of just listing my infractions, he breaks it down and explains step by step why it's a problem and needs to be addressed. He's just so danged reasonable about it that, even though I don't want to, I find myself agreeing with him.

He's also less likely to back down now. While I have also grown over these past few months and now take more responsibility for my actions instead of making excuses, I still occasionally find myself trying to talk my way out of trouble. He always listens to what I have to say, but if a legitimate reason isn't forthcoming, he goes forward with what he has planned.

And yes I got spanked, although it ended up being delayed by a couple hours after the lecture. Right as I was being sent to collect implements, the doorbell rang so Steve got up to deal with that. It was his boss. He finally got rid of him only to have a neighbor show up. After the neighbor left, Steve realized how late it was getting and said he had to fix something on one of the cars before the daylight was gone.

Since it wasn't supposed to take that long to do, he sent me to the bedroom to wait. It ended up taking a little longer than he anticipated, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. As I laid there across the bed with the implements laid out beside me, I had some time to think and by the time he came in, the lecture he had given earlier had really sunk in.

We talked for a minute and then he got down to business. It wasn't fun, but when are they ever. But now it's behind us and hopefully I can get my head back where it needs to be so we have smooth sailing ahead.

10 comments:

  1. It is so wonderful to see that you've both grown. :) My husband and I just started two months ago, and he's still lacking in the lecture phase. But this really gives me hope because a spanking without a lecture can leave me confused. I hope things only continue to get better. :)

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    1. Thanks Es May. It took Steve a little while to get the hang of the lecture. He still misses the mark sometimes, but he's a lot better at it these days.

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  2. Glad you guys are growing together!
    lol and OMG I hate when they're reasonable and right! Lol ;)

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  3. Yes I agree with Elle. It's strange how reasonable men can sound isn't it. Starman has a special quiet and reserved voice. But as he lectures during our maintenance, I am not left waiting around. I'm not sure how I would react to that. Especially if I had to lay next to an arsenal of implements. But that's a moot point anyway, because Starman always heads straight for the one I hate the most! LOL!

    Hugs, Ami

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    1. Thanks Ami. Steve doesn't usually send me to the bedroom to wait so it was definitely different. And having to lay there waiting with not one, but two of my most hated implements stunk. I don't like any of our implements, but the ones i hate the most he generally saves for when he really wants to make an impression, like in cases of deliberate disobedience or when he's already punished over the exact same thing fairly recently.

      Last night was more punishment than maintenance. I had pushed a few too many buttons these last couple days. As far as lectures go, he normally lectures a little before the spanking and then some more during the spanking. I can only think of one other occasion where there was a gap of a few hours between the lecture and the spanking.

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  4. Dang Dana - There just is no way to argue when they get that firm, calm reasonable voice even when you want to. It just all makes so much sense and then ya just feel bad. You are both growing so I have no doubt that you can get your head back where it needs to be. Wishing you both "smooth sailing".

    Blessings,
    Cat

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    1. Exactly Cat. You just have to agree with them when they lay it all out in a reasonable manner. I went into the lecture thinking what he was asking was unreasonable. By the time he got done, I felt like I was the one being unreasonable. Ugh!

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  5. Hi Dana, my husband was pretty good at the lecturing and calling me on any excuses I come up with or attempts to evade. It's just so hard to do when they are so calm and reasonable isn't it? Over time, he has got even better at it. I think I too have grown some in terms of taking responsibility for my actions.

    I'm glad it's behind you now and wish you smooth sailing ahead.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Thanks Roz. It is hard to argue with such clear logic. Once Steve started seeing the excuses for what they were, an attempt to get out of trouble, he did start calling me on them. I still fall into that trap occasionally, but I'm getting better about it.

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