Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Words of Wisdom from Dana: Round 2

After all my mature posts this past week, you probably think I have it all together. I hate to disillusion you, but all the growth doesn't come without some growing pains. So I have some more pearls of wisdom for you all.

If your HoH starts a sentence with "You better hope..." it's a good idea to pay attention because the sentence is probably not going to end with "or I'm going to send you to the spa for the day then take you out to a romantic dinner followed by mind-blowing sex that gives you multiple orgasms." It's going to be more like "You better hope I have a clean towel when I get out of the shower or I'm going to blister your tail."

When saying something rude when your HoH is around, it's important to make sure they know that the comment wasn't directed towards them. Otherwise they might somehow get the idea you called them an asshole and respond accordingly.

And along those same lines, if you try to say that rude remark was not directed towards them when it was, you're probably going to get spanked not only for the rude remark, but also lying about it.

Interrupting your HoH's warning about attitude to tell them "bite me" is a very bad idea. Doing it while your bottom is uncovered and therefore unprotected borders on insanity.

Spankings on a cold bottom hurt more so either stay out of trouble in the winter or find a way to warm your buns before the spanking.

The shower is not the best place to smart off. Smarting off right after you get out isn't the best idea either.

And last, but not least: The same HoH who can't hear you calling him for dinner when he is three feet away will suddenly develop supersonic hearing when you make a sassy remark under your breath on the other end of the house. He will be able to hear it despite every TV in the house being on, fire trucks and ambulances going by with their sirens wailing, the dogs barking and your child singing at the top of her lungs.

12 comments:

  1. Lol, my fireman has a tendency to turn on his supersonic hearing in those moments too. :)

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    1. It amazes me how well he can hear when I don't want him to. Yet I can call him to dinner five times before he finally hears me.

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  2. Well all I can say is that your shower is bigger than ours if you were in there together! But I know what you mean about elephant ears. They always hear the things you don't want them to hear. I don't think I'd like a cold bott either. Although it sounds as if yours could have been warmed up pretty quick.

    Hugs, Ami

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    1. One of the showers is anyway. Our master bath, such as it is, has such a tiny shower in it that i end up bumping into the walls with just me in there. If we take a shower together, it's in the main bathroom which is much bigger.

      I don't know why, but a spanking a cold butt always hurts more than when your bottom is already warm. It probably has something to do with the cold slowing circulation and the spanking returning that circulation quickly. And yes, he did warm me up pretty quick that time and a few more since then.

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  3. Sorry Dana but I'm cracking up over here. Not at you getting in trouble but at the way you wrote it.

    Please try to keep out of trouble for a bit and if ya can't, then learn how to talk back and call him names in another language...preferably one he doesn't understand. ;)

    Blessings,
    Cat

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  4. It's okay to crack up Cat. I'd probably do the same thing if someone else had written it.

    Knowing Steve, he'd probably tell me to translate what I said or get a spanking. Even if I didn't, he's pretty good at reading my tone and expression so I'd probably still get in trouble.

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  5. LOL Dana, OMG, all very bad ideas. Thanks for the tips, I've made a mental note and will try to remember these and stay out of trouble.

    Rude remarks and saying things like "bite me", especially in the middle of him giving a warning are definitely bad ideas ... and what is it with the supersonic hearing? Seems all HoH's are somehow 'blessed' with that super power LoL

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Yeah in hindsight, they weren't the brightest ideas.

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  6. Uhoh! Gee, I wonder how you came to these conclusions. lol Sorry, but these cracked me up...even though I've figured out some of them the hard way myself. ;)

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    1. Yeah I seem to require learning things the hard way Grace. But I do usually learn from my mistakes so it's not a total loss.

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  7. Lol Dana
    Glad I'm not the only one with this problem.
    I think add to that list " keep your hair on" when you standing in the corner with a bare behind and being told why you're there lol NOT A GOOD IDEA

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    1. Sometimes I have a mouth-brain disconnect. Things fly out of my mouth before I really think them through.

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