After all my mature posts this past week, you probably think I have it all together. I hate to disillusion you, but all the growth doesn't come without some growing pains. So I have some more pearls of wisdom for you all.
If your HoH starts a sentence with "You better hope..." it's a good idea to pay attention because the sentence is probably not going to end with "or I'm going to send you to the spa for the day then take you out to a romantic dinner followed by mind-blowing sex that gives you multiple orgasms." It's going to be more like "You better hope I have a clean towel when I get out of the shower or I'm going to blister your tail."
When saying something rude when your HoH is around, it's important to make sure they know that the comment wasn't directed towards them. Otherwise they might somehow get the idea you called them an asshole and respond accordingly.
And along those same lines, if you try to say that rude remark was not directed towards them when it was, you're probably going to get spanked not only for the rude remark, but also lying about it.
Interrupting your HoH's warning about attitude to tell them "bite me" is a very bad idea. Doing it while your bottom is uncovered and therefore unprotected borders on insanity.
Spankings on a cold bottom hurt more so either stay out of trouble in the winter or find a way to warm your buns before the spanking.
The shower is not the best place to smart off. Smarting off right after you get out isn't the best idea either.
And last, but not least: The same HoH who can't hear you calling him for dinner when
he is three feet away will suddenly develop supersonic hearing when you
make a sassy remark under your breath on the other end of the house. He
will be able to hear it despite every TV in the house being on, fire trucks and ambulances going by with their sirens wailing, the dogs
barking and your child singing at the top of her lungs.