Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Laundry Woes

This morning Steve told me that I needed to get caught up on the laundry because he had his last pair of socks on. He generally doesn't care how often I do laundry as long as he doesn't reach in the drawer for something and find out that he's out. Ever the obedient wife (quit laughing), I promptly started a load of whites as soon as I finished packing his lunch.

He left for work and I watched one of my recorded shows on the DVR until the wash cycle was done. I transferred the load to the dryer, turned it on and started to walk away, only to come running back when this awful racket started.

I opened the door and peeked in. I didn't see anything that could be causing the noise inside the drum so I checked the lint trap to see if something had got sucked in there. Nothing there either so I shut the door and turned it back on. As soon as I turned it on, the noise started again. So I stopped it again.

I got distracted by something else for a while and then came back to try again. Still making noise. I really didn't feel like lugging all our laundry to the laundromat so I started researching other options.


Maybe I could string a clothes line across the laundry room and air dry. Of course as cold as it's been, they would probably take forever to dry. So I said the heck with it and walked away, figuring I'd get Steve to look at it when he got home..

When he came home, I told him I had washed his socks, but couldn't dry them because the dryer was making funny noises. He asked if I had left something in the pockets that might have got sucked into the vent and I told him I didn't think so because I always empty pockets before I put stuff in the washer.

He went out to look and came back in a minute later with a funny look. He asked if that was the sound it was making. I listened for a minute. The only thing I heard was a perfectly functioning dryer. So I asked what he did to fix it.

He didn't do anything. He just turned the darned thing on and it worked fine for him with no mysterious noises.

He gave me a look that said "nice try." and walked off with a smile. I swear he thinks I made up the whole thing just to get out of doing laundry.

Monday, February 25, 2013

Nothing Much Going On Here

My new attempt to go a month without a spanking is going strong. As of yesterday, I've made it a full week and I'm now starting into my second week. I came close to blowing it last week, but thankfully Steve cut me a break. I now appreciate those acts of grace a lot more than I used to.

Last week I was a little frustrated at not getting much time together. We normally don't get a lot of time with him working, but he's been waiting on materials for the jobsite he's on so he's been off for two weeks. While I knew there was some things he wanted to do while he was not working, I figured I'd get at least one day of having him all to myself.

It didn't happen. Every time I turned around, someone was calling him wanting him to come help with something. They needed help fixing their car. They needed help loading something. They needed pulled out of the ditch after they slid off the road on the ice (which wouldn't have happened if they hadn't insisted on going out to play on icy roads). They wanted company while they drove somewhere. They were bored and just wanted someone to come hang out with them. They needed him to drive them somewhere.

If that wasn't bad enough, on the rare occasion Steve was home, someone was here visiting. I hit my limit Thursday night when one of Steve's friends came by, dropped his kids off in the house and promptly disappeared for about three hours. He didn't even bother to ask first. So instead of enjoying a lazy evening with my husband and daughter, I was stuck trying to prevent the kids from messing up the place and playing referee because they kept fighting.

Add in some horror-moans and it was a recipe for disaster. After the friend picked up his kids and we finally got ours down for the night, I said something to Steve about how I was feeling. Unfortunately, my frustration came through in a bit of attitude. He told me the next day that he started to spank me over my attitude, but he knew I was right about what I was saying and he understood that I was hormonal and cranky about the whole situation so he decided to let me off with only a warning.

He did make up for the lack of time together in a big way. We spent the whole day together Friday. He surprised me by taking me jewelry shopping and pretty much telling me to pick out whatever I wanted. Most guys would probably worry about saying something like that to a woman, but Steve knows I'm picky about my jewelry and I'm also very budget minded so he didn't have to worry about me going crazy.

I fell in love with this one necklace. It was a little pricier than I thought he'd want to spend so I walked away from it. But after he noticed me going back to look at it again, he asked the jeweler to get it out so I could try it on, completely ignoring my protests about the price. As it turns out, we didn't get the necklace because it was snugger fitting than I like and they didn't have any longer ones. He did tell me that we'd try a few more jewelry stores when we had time so I may end up getting something yet.

My sister was visiting on Saturday so Steve asked her to watch our daughter so he could take me out that evening. He surprised me by picking the restaurant himself. In hindsight, it was a smart move. I love the restaurant he chose, but normally wouldn't ask to go there because it's expensive. Then when he saw me browsing the menu for the cheapest entree, he told me to quit looking at prices and order whatever I wanted. We ended up having a nice dinner out with good food and lots of laughter and conversation.

In other news, Steve's made a change to our role affirmation. When he first implemented it, it was every Monday night regardless of how things were going. But over this last month or so, things have finally clicked and I've been doing really well. The fact that I had a nearly three week streak of staying out of trouble even without role affirmation really impressed him. So he's decided to switch to doing it on an as-needed basis rather than every week.

Monday, February 18, 2013

And The Streak Comes to an End

We've had smooth sailing around here for a bit. Aside from a spanking the week before last that was more reset than punishment, I hadn't got spanked since last month. I was on a good streak and determined to keep it going as long as I could.

The thing that had both of us surprised about this is that we hadn't been doing role affirmation for a couple weeks. Normally when role affirmation doesn't happen, I start slipping a little and then move on to seeing how far I can push. I didn't do that this time around. Instead when Steve chose not to do role affirmation, I took it as a sign that we were on track and he didn't feel like we needed that reinforcement. Things were going great.

Until yesterday. I woke up with a headache and feeling cranky. I managed to keep things under wraps until around lunchtime. Then I got snappy. I might have got away with only a stern warning, but my mouth got away from me and I muttered "bite me" as I walked away. To be honest, I didn't really think he'd hear me say it. The memory of what happened the last time I said that is still pretty fresh in my mind.

Unfortunately, Steve did hear it. He asked "What did you say?" It was said in that tone that lets you know they know darn well what you said and are just wondering if you're going to be foolish enough to try to play it off like you didn't say it.

He came stalking towards me with a determined look and I backed away, sitting down fast just before he reached me. I didn't try to deny what I said since obviously we both knew it. I did, however, apologize for it. He let me know that it would be handled later when we didn't have little eyes watching us.

That should have been the end of it, but it wasn't. I was aggravated about breaking my streak. I knew he was disappointed in me. I was even more disappointed in myself. That all came out in more snapping. He didn't say anything else about it, but from the look in his eyes, it was pretty clear that he was keeping track and there would be hell to pay later.

My headache kept getting worse so a few hours later, I told Steve I was going to lay down. He took our daughter out for a while so I could rest. By the time they got back and I woke up again, it was supper time. He even fixed supper so I didn't have to bother with it.

I was feeling pretty guilty about my disrespect earlier in the day so I apologized again. He was really sweet about it, but made it clear that he had no intention of letting it go. So after our daughter was in bed, I followed him to the bedroom.

We laid there for a while just snuggling and watching TV. My head was still hurting a little so he rubbed my neck to help ease it. Finally he asked if I just wanted to put things off until today. He was afraid of making my headache worse if he spanked me.

I told him my head wasn't hurting that bad and I'd rather not have it hanging over my head for another day. He asked me if I was sure and then got started. It wasn't pleasant. Spankings never are when you haven't been spanked for a while. Add in how disappointed I was in myself for doing it in the first place and I got to tears pretty fast.

So now I'm back to the starting point. I don't think I'm quite ready to tackle a year without punishment so I'm starting small. My goal is to make it a month. Of course this time I will be starting with some role affirmation because after yesterday Steve decided that it's needed again.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

The Scent of Love

The night of our first date, I was nervous. A year after getting out of a serious relationship, I had only dated sporadically. Most of the guys I had dated during that time period were guys I already knew. I didn't know Steve that well.

I discarded several outfits before settling on one. I applied a little bit of makeup although I rarely wear it. And on the way out of the bathroom, I made a last second decision to spritz on a little vanilla body spray.

I didn't know then that Steve loved the smell of vanilla. I didn't know that my choice would be driving him wild all night long. I just liked the smell and wanted a little pick me up

Eight years later, it still drives him wild. I can walk in the bedroom wearing the skimpiest lingerie you can buy and if he's tired, he may not even notice. But let me walk in wearing frumpy sweats and a spritz of vanilla and he's tearing my clothes off.

I still use the same exact brand as I did years ago. I don't wear it all the time. If I did, we might never leave the bed. For a while when things were rocky between us, I didn't wear it at all. But since we've started TTWD, I've found myself wearing it more. I wear it not for its apparent aphrodisiac effects, although I do enjoy that, but because Steve has told me more than once that he loves it when I do wear it.

I guess you could say the scent of love around here is vanilla.

Meme Time

1: Do you like to use post-it notes?

Yes, I'm always using them. At any given time, there's at least a couple stuck to my computer to remind me of appointments/chores/etc.
2: Do you take shampoos/conditioner bottles from hotels?
Yes. While I'm picky about the shampoo and conditioner I use myself, I use the ones from hotels to stock the toiletries bin I keep for guests in case they forget their own.
3: Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
No
4: Do you have freckles?

Yes. Not so much on my face, but more on my upper chest and arms.
5: Do you always smile for pictures?

Not unless I have to. I hate having my picture taken.
6: What's your biggest peeve?
Automated telephone systems. I hate having to punch in my responses only to have the live person I eventually reach ask me to answer them all again. Besides, my phone will only let me punch in so many numbers before it makes you erase those numbers to put in more.
7: What's your favorite food?
Shrimp
8: What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Something to Talk About and Fried Green Tomatoes. I watch them every time they're on.
9: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
I do quick notes to Steve all the time. As for an actual letter, probably close to a year.
10: Favorite kind of sandwich?
Grilled cheese. I'm all about comfort food.
11: Best thing to eat for breakfast?
I don't generally eat breakfast.

12: What is your usual bedtime?
It depends on how early I have to get up. Usually midnight through the week and as late as 2 am on weekends.

13: Do you sing in the shower?

Sometimes
14: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
Probably not.

Monday, February 11, 2013

Words of Wisdom from Dana: Round 3

Your intrepid DD scientist is back with more words of wisdom for you.

While kids are great for dodging spankings, just remember they eventually go to sleep or school so it pays to have a backup plan. The same applies with company.

If your HoH is kind enough to let you slide on not doing something one day, it's probably not a good idea to see if they'll let it slide the next day too.

If your HoH tells you that they are going to start enforcing a previously unenforced rule, you probably shouldn't test that on the same day they say it.

Telling your HoH about anything another HoH did or said is a bad idea, unless of course the other HoH did something really sweet like take their partner on a romantic cruise or give a hall pass.

Apparently dishes are not truly done until they are not only washed, but also put away. Who knew? And from what I've heard, the same applies to laundry.

When your HoH keeps mentioning something and you ignore them, chances are it's going to be a spankable offense in the very near future, or even worse, a rule that makes it a spankable offense every time.

You can only "forget" something so many times before your HoH catches on.

If you kick your feet hard enough in close proximity to the blanket, it may fly up and cover your bottom for a minute. Of course when your HoH realizes it and yanks it back, he's probably going to give a couple extra stingy swats to make up for the ones the blanket cushioned.

Friday, February 8, 2013

The Good and the Bad of It

Last weekend's adventure brought a few changes. I guess any life-threatening event is bound to make you re-examine your priorities. This has led to some good things and some bad.

On the good side, there's more closeness. One of the things that domestic discipline brought to our marriage was more closeness. As we grew closer over the past few months, I didn't really think we could get much closer. I was wrong. Ever since Steve showed up to rescue me, I've been clinging to him.

And he's grew closer to me as well. A couple times this week, I've had to drive in the rain, something I hate to do. Every time, he has called shortly after I got back home to make sure I made it safely. And even on days without rain, he's called during the day just to check on me.

Also on the good side is more respect. While I don't set out to intentionally be disrespectful to Steve, it is something I have struggled with, especially since he started enforcing that rule. But this week, I haven't got in trouble a single time for disrespect. I'm thinking things through a little more before I speak and it's showing.

On the bad side, I've spent more time this week focusing on doing the things I enjoy. On the surface, that sounds innocent, at least until you think about what got neglected in order for me to take that time. If you guessed time for my household chores, you'd be right. While I didn't completely abandon all chores, I definitely slacked on them.

This morning after I got back from taking our daughter to school, I climbed back in bed with Steve. He turned on a show we both like and I laid my head in his lap and stretched out across the bed. After the show went off, he started talking, mentioning a few things he had noticed I had been slacking on. He punctuated the conversation with an occasional swat with this hand. The more he talked, the more he swatted and the harder the swats got.

I was a bit surprised because he doesn't generally spank with his hand. He tends to save his hand for the occasional erotic spanking. But I quickly found out that his hands pack just as much wallop as the implements he usually uses.

Then once I was sufficiently warmed up (his words), he sent me for the paddle and cane. It wasn't a long spanking or even really a hard one, just enough to keep my attention focused on him as he talked. The cane, thankfully, was only used for the last couple swats as a reminder of what to expect if I kept slacking, and he didn't do it as hard as he usually does.

Afterwards we snuggled for a bit and then moved on to more intimate ways of reconnecting. When I left the bedroom, I felt calm, secure and ready to face the day.

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Marriage Conference

Growing our marriage is something that's very important to me. Shortly after we started TTWD, I visited the local Christian bookstore. I went to find a women's devotional since I had long outgrown the teen devotional Bible I've had for years. Instead I found some other books, or rather they found me. After looking at a couple books on marriage and submission, I put them back. But I kept finding myself going back to them. Finally I figured if God kept putting those books in my hands, He meant for me to read them. So I bought them.

That started us both on the road to growing our marriage. Since then, we've bought several more books, including a couple's devotional. We've also found Bible study guides about marriage online and studied them together and separately.

But the one thing that never occurred to us was a marriage conference or retreat. I don't know why it didn't. After all, I know some churches do couples retreats. Ours doesn't as far as I know, but I have heard of other churches doing it.

The other day as I was catching up on Facebook, I noticed one of my friends mention that she had just registered her husband and herself for a marriage conference. She provided a link to the conference they were planning to attend. I wasn't going to check out the link because I figured with her living in a different state, chances were that the conference was going to be too far away.

But something told me to look and, to my surprise, I found out the conference is only a couple hours away from us. It's also near enough to my family that we can leave our daughter with them instead of trying to find a sitter for the weekend.

I talked to Steve about it and while he wasn't as thrilled by the idea as I was, he said we could go. So, barring any unforeseen circumstances, it looks like we'll be attending our first ever marriage conference later this month. I'm excited. Aside from this being our first conference, it will also be the first time we've went away without our daughter since she was born, something that is long overdue.

Monday, February 4, 2013

Reflections

I've heard people say that in a life threatening situation, their lives flashed before them. As I fought the steering wheel to regain control of my spinning car this weekend, that didn't happen to me. Instead I felt fear and regret.

My daughter was asleep in the backseat when it happened. I was terrified that we'd get hit by another car or slide off the other side of the road. All I could think of is that I might lose her, that she might get hurt or worse. I prayed that God would protect her even if he didn't protect me. I didn't care about my own safety, only hers.

I regretted that I might not get another chance to let my loved ones know how much I really love them. I regretted angry words spoken, the times I let stubbornness and pride get in the way of apologizing, and not cherishing every day I had with them. I felt regret that I might leave Steve alone after we've worked so hard to build our marriage.

Thankfully it didn't come to that. We ended coming through the experience without a single injury, although it scared me out of my wits. My daughter slept through the entire thing, not waking until after we were stopped and sitting on the side of the road.

Later as we sat in a restaurant waiting on Steve to arrive, I worried about his safety. When he walked in the door, all I wanted to do was run to him, throw myself in his arms and never let go. But our daughter beat me to it so I sat back and waited until she was done.

And since then, I've clung to Steve every chance I get. I hardly want to let him out of my sight.

That one terrifying moment has brought us closer than any other thing we've faced to date. It's sad in a way, though, that it took something like this to make me realize how much I really do love him and want to cherish every moment that we have together. Now I'm determined that not a single day is going to go by without me letting my loved ones know they are loved and cared about.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

No Matter What Happens, He'll be There

Yesterday morning we took off going out of town to pick up a truck that Steve had bought. I went along to drive the car back. Since we were going to be close to where my family lives, our plan was for me to go with him to get the truck then he'd take it home while I took the car to visit family.

It was a good plan, but we failed to consider the variable nature of weather. You see we'd had some snow a few days earlier, but it was already melting off. But more was supposed to moving in last night. We thought we'd both be home before the snow came.

Things didn't work as planned. When we picked up the truck, it started spitting snow. I learned how to drive in the mountains so driving in the snow doesn't really bother me me, which is why I turned down Steve when he offered to let me take the new truck since it's four wheel drive. I figured I had plenty of time to get home before the roads got bad so I told him I'd be fine with my car, but I would cut my family visit short so I wasn't leaving as late.

The weather changed fast. I had visited with family for less than an hour when the snow started really coming down. So I left then, figuring I might run into an occasional patch of ice, but would otherwise be okay.

I was wrong. Two hours after I left heading home, I wasn't even halfway to our house and I'd already slid out of the road once. I called Steve to ask how the roads were around the house and he said they were fine so I decided to keep going figuring I'd be out of the icy roads soon.

About a half hour after I talked to him, I started up the mountain that we have to cross to get to our house. I got about halfway up when my car started spinning. Then it spun completely around on me. When it stopped spinning, I was off the side of the road and facing back the way we'd came from.

To be honest, it scared me. With me alone, it was bad enough, but our daughter was in the backseat. If we hadn't slid out of the road, we might have got hit by another car. If the car had slid off the other side of the road, we probably would have got hurt. I sat there on the side of the road for a couple minutes waiting on my hands to quit shaking and my pulse to return to normal.

Thankfully a passerby stopped to check on me. I told them we were fine, just a little shook up. They offered to wait to be sure I could get back on the road, which turned out to be a good thing because when I went to take off, I was stuck. So they pushed me out and I headed back down the mountain to the last town I had passed so I could call Steve.

I told him what had happened. He freaked out at first, but calmed down once I assured him we were fine and even the car was fine. He really didn't want me to get back on the road to find a hotel or backtrack to where I started so once he made sure we were somewhere safe and warm, he told me to stay put until he got there.

The trip that would normally take an hour took him three hours. Meanwhile, my daughter and I sat at a fast food restaurant until they closed. Then as they were closing, an officer came by and drove us to another restaurant down the road that was open 24 hours. I worried the entire time because I knew how bad the roads were.

I breathed a sigh of relief when he walked in the restaurant with a friend of his. The friend drove me and my daughter in the truck following Steve who drove my car to the house of the family member that lived nearby. Then we all piled in the truck together and made the long trek back over the mountain to home. All in all, I arrived home 10 hours after I initially set out.

As I curled up in his arms to go to sleep last night, I said a prayer of thanksgiving. Despite the hazardous road conditions, we all came through it safely.