Friday, August 3, 2012

Morning Spankings Suck

You know what sucks?

Getting spanked.

You know what sucks even more?

Getting spanked in the morning.

You know what sucks the most?

Getting woke up with a spanking.

Note I did not say getting woke up for a spanking. Nope. I got brought out of a dead sleep this morning by the crack of a wooden spoon against my backside. Needless to say, I was not happy about it. I even used a word I very rarely use when I asked what it was for. Steve's response was you know what for. Ugh!

Seeing as how I had just woke up, I asked for reprieve for a minute so I handle an urgent need. He told me to come straight back and get into position. Then it started. It was not pleasant. There was no warmup. There was no pause between swats to make it easier for me to handle. It was just rapid-fire swats that had me kicking, squirming and begging him to stop.

It hurt and my bottom is still tender right now as I write this. The sad thing is that this morning's spanking was just over dishes. He had commented on them yesterday and I stupidly chose to ignore him. So when he woke up this morning and saw that I had not only not done the dishes he had commented on, but also the dishes since then, he was not pleased.

But I probably have a much worse spanking coming this evening. You see I've been slipping and sliding all week. I've been under a lot of stress and had my hands full between having a houseful of kids (babysitting) and dealing with an out of state family member's emergency (that nearly resulted in me having to go out of state to handle). Steve has been under a lot of stress as well and dealing with an injury that occurred at the beginning of the week.

It was a recipe for disaster. I've managed to break nearly every rule we have, some of them multiple times. So today after I finish my backlog of chores, I'm going to sit down and write out every rule I've broken this week. After our daughter goes to sleep tonight, we're going to sit down together and go over my list and discuss things.

I'm not looking forward to our discussion because I know once he realizes the full extent of my disobedience this week, I'm probably in for the worst punishment yet. Whatever he decides, I'm going to accept it because I know I majorly screwed up this week and I know I deserve it. But the main reason I'm going to accept it is because I love him and I hate knowing I disappointed him. I know that whatever punishment he decides for me, it will clean the slate and allow us to get back on track.

After all, that's why I brought domestic discipline to Steve. I was tired of getting caught up in the downward spiral. I was tired of feeling overwhelmed by guilt and knowing that he was simmering with resentment. I was tired of us not having something to stop things in their tracks before they went too far.

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